Stripey Socks

I bought several pairs of stripey and argyle socks at Banana Republic two days ago with a gift card that I had been sitting on since Christmas. God, their clothes were really expensive. I had 99 dollars to blow so I (for once) was practical and bought the high quality socks and underwear I would need for Japan. I'm only moderately materialistic, but I can't stand having shitty socks and underwear.

I hate writing about people's reactions to my leaving for Japan because it makes it sound like I'm obssessing over it and critiquing how people are treating me lately. I guess I sort of am, but it's far less than when I went to France. In fact, I'm not really caring all that much about it. It somehow doesn't seem like too big of a deal.

But today, two students that I never taught (except for one--he was in my summer school class and was memorable for stealing an entire pizza at the end of the class party in his backpack) were so genuinely excited for me. They're anime-freaks and have become obssessed with the culture. There were talks of webcasting, video game contests, and other ways to bridge the gap across the ocean. I felt excited and inspired with the prospects. I'm sure it won't happen, but it was nice to consider it.

And the kid that stole the pizza--I'm so happy for him because he finally found a niche at meat-head central. He's even saying that he's going to miss it as he leaves for college.

The other kid--he's just like the most genuinely nice person I've encountered in some time. Almost angelic and warm. I'm happy that innocence can still withstand all the high school bullshit from time to time.

Today was quite stressful with all I tried to do and fell short a bit. My final exams are almost done which means that I'll be able to coast the rest of the week and next. Two of three copied. Tomorrow--pizza party for the newspaper staff and faculty party. Geez, faculty party. I wish I could get sloshed, but I've vowed to be very SAFE until I leave. A DUI would ruin my entire life, as would killing someone in an accident. (Knocking on virtual wood here).

I really messed up, though. I had been considering offering for Betsy to take John (her new beau) to the wedding we were supposed to go to on Saturday instead of me. I wanted to do it nicely. I saw the Vaselines were playing on Saturday and decided to just ask her if she would mind if I didn't go. God, I have it all sorted out in my mind, then the second I start talking on the phone, I turn into an asshole mush mouth. I really should not be allowed to telephone people.

So I told her/asked her about it. And I was an asshole. Two minutes later, I realized I should have just gone to the wedding--not out of necessity but because it would have been fun. The Vaselines are probably going to be moderately ok, but a wedding is a wedding. I haven't done a friend type wedding--geez, ever. I fucked up semi-royal.

I should and shouldn't worry about this shit. Hopefully Betsy will understand.

I wish people could walk in my stripey socks for a day to know how bad I feel when I shoot myself in my foot!